honda jazz - finally here

after a long long wait, honda jazz has finally come to india. it was launched yesterday, 10th june; and here are some captures from TEAM-BHP


the car is priced at 7.75 lakhs ex-showroom, and the base model would cost around 7 lakhs


its a rarity that the same model is sold all over the world without any changes in body-design or interiors. the dashboard is just fabulous.



for more info and review, click here

french open 2009 ends on happy note

there is lots to cheer about the results of the french open this year. leander paes won the mens-doubles match and brought much pride to india.

and finally, roger federer conquered french open. the absence of nadal may have made it easier, psychologically. but that was just an advantage which he had to make good of. and champion players don't miss out on such opportunities. i am so happy for him. at last, after so many tormenting months federer is champion again.

and the best part was the lovely steffi graf's presence in the womens-singles final match, where she was present. she is still so beautiful...

world environment day ... what a farce!

just see this video, one of the best comic acts, that dispels the notion of events like 'world environment day' and 'save the planet'. george carlin at his best...

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eScDfYzMEEw&hl=en&fs=1&]

ford fiesta sedan - first offical pictures

few days back, at china's guangzhou auto-show, ford fiesta sedan was showcased.



it was a subtle way of revealing ford's strategy and how china features in their scheme of things.



the car will be available all across asia and north-america by 2010. it will not be marketed/sold in europe though.



no technical details are out yet. watch this space to know more.

cm's yesterday, cm's today

manmohan singh's cabinet has taken a long time to come. and guess whom we see in the ministeries??? all ex-chief ministers are now cabinet minsters.

here's a small list of such people:
sm krishna
veerappa moily
virbhadra singh
vilas rao deshmukh
farooq abdullah
sharad pawar
ghulam nabi azad
sushil kumar shinde
ak anthony
vayalar ravi

they are senior leaders and have served the party well. and their cm tenure should have been more than enough. why make them cabinet ministers? they were cm's yesterday, they are cm's today

MNS Disrupts Photo-shoot

MNS does it again. A few days back they disrupted the photo-shoot which was happening in a Juhu, Mumbai.

The ph0to-shoot was no doubt hot, as Neetu Chandra and Krishikha Gupta were slugging it out on the poolside in a bikini.

While they were still in the heat of the moment, loud sloganeering 'Jai Maharashtra' was heard. And soon enough, the MNS goons appeared and they halted the photo-shoot.

The shoot was on for the cover of The Man magazine, when Raj Thackeray's men stopped proceedings.

BigB Wax Idol In Madame Tussauds NYC

Amitabh Bachchan's wax idol now makes its debut in the Madame Tussauds Museum in New York.

The backdrop of the statue is a replica of the Taj Mahal.


In fact, this idol is much better than the one which they had put-up in London. The previous idol seemed amateurish, while this looks fine; they got the proportions right and the face is much-much better. So, do rush to NYC and photograph yourself with BigB.

ipl2 finals - kal ke zero, aaj ke hero

last year ipl ended with RCB and DC being at the bottom of the points table. and this year, we have RCB and DC being the finalists of ipl2.

in fact, at the beginning of ipl2, RCB did not have a good start. but change of captaincy and change of attitude has helped them. on the other hand, DC started off the tourney in a great way under the leadership of gilchrist.

whoever wins tomorrow, ipl2 has been a success. i will be cheering RCB, may the best team win. both the teams are winners, coming back from the dumps. zero yesterday, hero today!

with power comes arrogance ...

manmohan singh was sworn-in yesterday as the new pm of india. it was a momentous occasion as the 15th lok sabha had given a decisive verdict in favour of congress(i) and since 1971, manmohan singh is the first pm to complete a full 5 yrs term and voted back to power.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8IM4YI5Bdho&hl=en&fs=1]

since 1991, this has been cong's best performance with a whopping 200+ seats. and this unpredicted success has probably gone to their head. they are suddenly found distancing themselves from their allies. while dmk was over-expecting by asking for so many ministries, but yet cong should try and mend their ways and politely disagree. no point in angering your allies, they will come handy during crisis and approval of important bills.

similarly, even rjd and sp should be kept in good humour. lalu yadav has been behind the cong and supported sonia gandhi during worst of crisis like 'foreign origin' issue etc. i surely do believe that cong should try and keep all their allies happy by distributing the goodies with everybody. cong should share the pie with everybody and not just make them eat humble pie. cong is in danger of falling into the power-trap, coz with power comes arrogance...

time management personality types

recently i had a session on time management and quite a lot of things were spoken about skills and techniques involved in using time in a more efficient manner.  my personal opinion, albeit a little philosophical, is that we don't manage time but time manages us. time for me is synonymous with destiny, as we usually say time-time ki baat hai

anyways, coming back to the session, a very interesting thing remained with me even after walking out of the session. it was about the various time management personality types based on the way in which different types of people manage themselves within the given time-frame or how they use their time, their behaviour pattern etc. here goes the types, place yourself in it:

perfectionist: these guys are, more often than not, over-indulgent. they get into minute details and begin micro-managing things. they never do a hurried job coz they want to be precise about everything.


fireman: these people treat every incident as critical. they are always on the run, from one crisis to another. they are busy putting out fire, extinguish one then move to the next. they burn-out soon, that's a major consequence.

over-committer: these guys accept every task that comes their way. they just cannot refuse anything that's asked of them. this results in them always running away from the very people who have assigned him tasks.

chatty-kathy: these guys have very good communication skills and thye just can't stop themselves from indulging into small-talk with every tom-dick-harry. this talkative nature leads to pending tasks and unfinished work.

aquarian: these are another breed of people who have work piled on their desk. but its not because they are chatty, its because they are tardy. not just tardy, sometimes they don't even have the wllingness to perform.

having read these, where do you place yourself?

KKR salvage pride, MI bring shame

kkr have won the last two matches and salvaged some pride. in fact, they have ended their ipl2 on a positive note with a win. this will boost them up as well as bring some cheer to srk. and more importantly, it was not a match of no consequence. kkr's win actually resulted in rajasthan royals being out of the tourney. that in itself would have given them immense satisfaction. kkr peaked a little too late; a case of too little, too late.

on the other hand, MI haven't played to their potential at all. they have been a big let-down. the team that boasts of tendulkar, jayasuriya, zaheer khan etc just haven't played their best cricket. they have lost 3 close matches which they should have won. if a team can't chase 120[lost to RCB] and if they can't score 4 runs off 6 balls then they don't deserve to be in the semis.

paan singh tomar - a soldier, an athlete, a bandit

i had not heard of PST ever, until the day tigmanshu dhulia announced that he would be making a movie on him.

initially i thought it was some fictitious character coz the name sounded quite strange. but i was in for a big surprise when i did a bit of reserach on PST and realised that tigmanshu was getting ready to shoot a biographical on a real life character.

PST is quite an enigma, his story is definitely worth telling. a man who served the army in the 'rajputana rifles', took to the tracks and created national records in steeplechase, picked up arms and became a bandit and finally was shot dead by police in an encounter. what a fascinating tale to tell!

in 1958 national games held in cuttack, he timed 9mins & 12.4 sec in the steeplechase event and created a national record. later, in 1964 Open Meet he broke his own record at the karnail singh stadium, delhi with a timing of 9mins & 4 sec.

in between the two records, in 1962 during the India-Germany meet he won the gold medal.

so, what made hin take up the gun? 1960's was a difficult phase for india. there was the impact of 2 wars and of course the widespread poverty and slow-rate of development. maybe such social issues and class barrier, impoverished demography, and a non-paying sports field and army-life may have pushed him into desperation. he became a bandit.

and he was finally put to rest in a police encounter. a sad end to a life which had seen more glories and deserved much more than he got.

it will be difficult for tigmanshu to translate this complex story on screen because very less is known abt PST. there is not much info available, no photographs or videos of his athletic skills etc. i believe his coaches and close friends are still there to recount the tale.

what i have stated above as a disadvantage can turn into advantage because it gives tigmanshu the freedom to mould the character any-which-way since little is known about him. and with irfan khan playing the lead, i am sure he will do justice to the character. all the best to the team of PST. hope to see this character come alive on screen, pretty soon.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzrOSwmor-A&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1]

prabhakaran dead - bure kaam ka bura natija

its been almost 18 years since rajiv gandhi was assassinated by ltte who used a human bomb to eliminate him. it was a gruesome act in which all the body parts were scattered by the impact of explosion.

the sri lankan govt has finally found the dead body of prabhakaran, head of ltte, in similar state. his head was totally delinked from rest of the body. the head had to be placed above the shoulder for photo-shoot. even that part of the head was without the temple and hairs. a gory scene, to say the least.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnHzdQlqoHE&hl=en&fs=1]

violence begets violence, a case of divine justice. prabhakaran finally met the fate what he had written for many others. terrorism cannot resolve any issue, in fact it gives birth to a new set of problems and un-thought of consequences. please give peace a chance, make love not war.

Prakash Mehra - A Tribute

Amitabh Bachchan'S Job Interview In Namak Halaal
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qI6jg3z60eQ&hl=en&fs=1]

Pag Ghungroo Bandh
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1vwzHHdOaM&hl=en&fs=1]

Amitabh Bachchan Warding Off A Fly In Namak Halaal
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNWx0B919vk&hl=en&fs=1]

Thodi Si Jo Pee Li Hai
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRnZyp4CGOg&hl=en&fs=1]

The Angry Youngman
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmJrs8gfyi0&hl=en&fs=1]

Haseena Maan Jayegi - Chale The Saath Milkar
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jhb-B2Fd3Bo&hl=en&fs=1]

Haseena Maan Jayegi - O Dilbar Janiye
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Oygv-FEOpA&hl=en&fs=1]

Mela - Rut Hai Milan Ki
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkFC5Wxmepo&hl=en&fs=1]

Sharaabi - Jahan Char Yaar
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQpv5GN0lCk&hl=en&fs=1]

Sharaabi - De De Pyar De
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4khzOsqIuU&hl=en&fs=1]

Haath Ki Safai - Wada Karle Sajna
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XdJVp5ANBK0&hl=en&fs=1]

Hera Pheri - Title Song
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twvCohKU1oY&hl=en&fs=1]

Muqaddar Ka Sikandar - O Saathi Re
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OssRAVZhsRk&hl=en&fs=1]

Laawaris - Mere Angne Mei
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FNYKdjm9NEA&hl=en&fs=1]

Muqaddar Ka Sikandar - Zindagi To Bewafa Hai
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qqlLPOPK0s&hl=en&fs=1]

maruti ritz - new car on the block

maruti has come out with their new car 'ritz' to compete with hyundai's i20/getz and chevrolet's u-va. as usual, the design of the rear is pretty bad. but its awesome from the front and profile view.

these images are taken from team-bhp

the pricing of the car is competitive as well. its priced at 3.9 lac ex-works price, which means that on-raod price will be around 4.75 lac



for more info please click here

pm's in-waiting will remain so...

the polls results are out and we have a decisive pm in manmohan singh, thank god for that.

till a few days back, when the poll pandits had predicted a hung parliament and at best they were a little optimistically saying that UPA may return to power, the third front was in fray. i too was scared at the thought of third front coming to power, mainly because of the probable pm's who were being thrown up as options. all the smaller parties who were led by political stalwarts with narrow vision and immediate gains, wanted to become a pm. mayawati even went to the extent of asking the third front to declare her as pm-candidate, a couple of months back. lalu prasad, mulayam singh, nitish kumar, sharad pawar, jayalalitha etc...all aspired for the top job. all these are now pm's in waiting.

the above mentioned politicians could aspire for the pm-post only because they have seen how deve gowda and ik gujral became pm's although they never had all-india-appeal.

and of course there was the bjp's old warhorse lk advani, the declared pm in-waiting for the longest time ever. and even before he could come close to the elusive pm post, some members of his own party and some business entrepreneurs declared narendra modi as their pm-probable. so, modi became the pm in-waiting for 2014 elections. all these guys are just waiting their turn, but they will need lot more than votes. they need people's acceptability and their own allies receptability.

anyways, all issues are buried for now as manmohan singh will become only the 2nd pm to be voted back to power after a full 5 year term, since 1971. so, the pm's in-waiting and pm's-probable will remain so...

left parties ... living in fool's paradise

today was the 5th and final phase of polling and exit polls are coming out with their predictions, one after another.

the exit poll results suggest that it will be a photo-finish between the Cong and BJP, but what is totally clear is that Left is nowhere close to either weilding power or dictating terms.

Exit Poll Source	BJP	CONGRESS	THIRD FRONT	OTHERS
CNN-IBN	135-150	145-160	110-130	70-100
Times Now	183	198	-	162
Headlines Today	180	191	38	134
India TV	194	195	108	46
News X	191	199	104	48
UTVi	189	195	-	14
Star News	196	199	100	36

2004 polls were historic in a sense that BJP were the front-runners and the clear favourites to win at least 300 seats on its own, but that did not happen. in fact, Cong pipped them to the post by becoming the largest single party. and for the 1st time, Left parties together garnered 60+ seats.

so, history will now remain history because Left parties will be back to their realistic total number of seats hovering around the 35-40 mark. they can never think of getting 60+ seats again, never.

another reason why i say that they are living in fool's paradise is because of their opposition to the nuclear deal, their out-dated economic policies and their anti-US foreign policy which recognises just one country, china.

its time they re-think their policies and not repeat nandigram. while they practised disinvestment in WB, they opposed it in the centre. they need to shift focus and be forward-thinking. follow the reading on the wall, understand what jyoti basu and buddhadeb are trying to say; its still not late. else, continue to live in fool's paradise.

amateur vs professional

i was just reading a blog post by john august where he speaks about an amateur against a professional. he starts out with the generally accepted fact that a professional is one who gets paid for doing a particular kind of job, while an amateur is someone who does the same thing out of love. so, pay-package forms one of the major differences.

but, he later debunks the above notion with some really interesting points. he goes on to say that what happens when the amateur goes professional - does he stop loving what he does?

so, basically the difference between the two is of mindset. sometimes professionals do things amateurishly; e.g. an accountant misses a decimal point in the final figures. sometimes an amateur does things really professionally; e.g. an amateur's photograph making it to the Discovery magazine.

here's a small list of the qualities that can make an amateur look professional and vice versa:

a. presentation - writing a business letter with loads of typos

b. accuracy - a pharmacist doling out the wrong medicine

c. consistency - a fastfood joint stuffing different ingredients each time in a club sandwich

d. accountability - taking the bottomline

e. peer standards - going by the accpeted norms of people doing the same job, e.g. bar association

here's the link which has the entire post finely worded

winning is a habit, so is losing

As knight riders lost their match to royal challengers, my heart went out to them. Although I supported the RCB team, I still thought that KKR might pull it off because 174 is a huge target.

KKR played very well till the 16th over, but then they could not hold onto the advantage. They fiddled away their chances as Ross Taylor belted a superb 81 off just 33 balls and saw RCB home comfortably.

KKR are low on confidence, have lost the will to win; a side in disarray with no one to show them the path. And KKR have made it a point to lose matches even from winning positions. They pull defeat out of the jaws of victory. Just as winning is a habit, so is losing.

winning is a habit, so is losing

as knight riders lost their match to royal challengers, my heart went out to them. although i supported the RCB team, i still thought that KKR might pull it off because 174 is a huge target.

KKR played very well till the 16th over, but then they could not hold onto the advantage. they fiddled away their chances as ross taylor belted a superb 81 off just 33 balls and saw RCB home comfortably.

KKR are low on confidence, have lost the will to win; a side in disarray with no one to show them the path. and KKR have made it a point to lose matches even from winning positions. they pull defeat out of the jaws of victory. just as winning is a habit, so is losing.

lo mai aa gaya ...

hey...i have found a new webspace and i hope to access this more often than i could access my blogspot account. hope it works out better this time around...

truth about s/w professionals

*10% of Software Professionals are predicted to be affected by major diseases like Carpal tunnel syndrome, heart diseases etc

*20% of Software Professionals marry their co-workers

*30% of Software Professionals are interested in Live in relationship because they tend to hate the responsibility both in office and house

*40% of Software Professionals are confused about settling down

*50% of Software Professionals has No savings in their Bank Account  

*60% of Software Professionals are not satisfied with their current wages

*70% of Software Professionals work more than 8 hours across globe

*80% of Software Professionals live away from their Parents ☹ ☹ ☹

*90% of Software Professionals are NOT HAPPY about their Life, meeting deadlines, client satisfaction, incentives, promotions, increment, onsite trips, wife, children, visa status, and commitments

*100% of Software professionals wish they had a choice other than computers in their life at least once in their lifetime.

15 years ago ...

A program was ... a television show

An application was ... meant for employment

Windows were ... something you hated to clean

A keyboard was ... a piano

Memory was ... something you lost with age

A CD was ... a bank account

A hard drive was ... a long trip on the road

Log on was ... adding wood to a fire

A mouse pad was ... where a mouse lived

A web was ... a spider's home

And a virus was ... flu

the last evacuation drill ...

XYZ Office  -> A fire alarm rang at 5 PM when almost all employees were in office. As usual, the entire office staff was evacuated within 3mins &  every employee gathered outside office. 10 mins passed..................................5  more mins passed.. then a Security Officer appeared.
 
 
Security Officer ->  Announcement started, "Dear Employees, With melting heart I am making this announcement  that for many of you this maybe the last evacuation drill as we are  laying off almost 80% of the employees. While moving in who-so-ever's ID card doesn't work they have been laid off & all their belongings will be couriered to them tomorrow. We followed this approach as we didn't want to fill mailbox with layoff mail in thousands & also to avoid any fight inside office. Hope you have a nice career ahead. Please move in & try your luck.
 

Quotes by Goran Ivanisevic

* The trouble with me is that every match I play against five opponents: umpire, crowd, ball boys, court, and myself.

* I wouldn't want to go to a sports psychiatrist, because when you're finished, you come out more crazy than you go in.

* I still break rackets, but now I do it in a positive way.

* My fines? I pay more fines than some guys' career prize money on the tour.

* I think it's interesting, you have three movies in one match: horror, comedy, drama. It's fun. I enjoy it. I am like that. I don't like to change. And if I could choose, I would be the same again. Just me, and I like who I am.

* In every game I play there are three players in me that could surface anytime, Good Goran, Bad Goran, Crazy Goran! They can all serve aces.

* I have so many runner-up cups that I am thinking of starting my own tea shop.

* I do not want that 'plate' again --- coming into his fourth Wimbledon final having lost the three others.

* Today's players, they do not know how. If you are going to throw it, you break it. You have to show commitment --- on throwing rackets

* I'll go kill myself --- after losing the Wimbledon 1998 final against Pete Sampras

* I woke up at 2 and went back to sleep at 3, I woke at 4 and went back to sleep at 5, when I next woke The Teletubbies were on TV, so I thought it must be time to get up --- on his night's sleep before the 2001 Final

* I don't understand it. She was no. 1 in the world and she retires. She was such an unbelievable player and could have won more Grand Slams. I don't know why she did it. Maybe it's a woman thing. I don't understand women. It's very sad for tennis .. a big loss --- speaking about the sudden retirement decision of Justine Henin while at Number 1

* It's just hitting; it's only 33 aces, that's not so good --- after his 1992 Wimbledon quarterfinal win against Stefan Edberg.

'sin'ister report from vatican

The Vatican recently released a report which says that men and women sin differently. While the most common sin for women was pride, men sin in their urge for sex. This report was created from the data that they gathered from the confession box.

What is funny is that, apart from the 7 original sins they have come out with a list of 7 modern sins. So, now we have 14 sins to contest with and classify people. The original sins were pride, envy, gluttony, lust, anger, greed and sloth. And the newly added modern sins are genetic modification, experiments on the person, environmental pollution, taking or selling illegal drugs, social injustice, causing poverty and financial greed. Unstoppable globalization, they feel, is the reason for the modern sins.

It also stated that men often fell prey to lust, followed by gluttony, sloth, anger, pride, envy and greed; and women fell prey to pride, envy, anger, lust and sloth. The Vatican may have come out with their findings, but I am not sure if anyone is reading them.

don't be concerned about public opinion ... just save your ass

A pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered in another race and it won again.

The local paper read: PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in any more races.

The next day the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES THE PASTOR'S ASS.

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline: NUN HAS THE BEST ASS IN TOWN .

The Bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey so she sold it to a farmer for $10.

The next day the headlines read: NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the high plains where it could run free.

The next day the headlines read : NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

Alas... The Bishop was buried the next day.

Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery and even shorten your life. So, be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll live longer.

points to ponder ...

I received this piece as an email. It got to me thinking and so I felt I should share it with everybody. Here it goes:

If we miniatrurize the world population [population of the Earth] to a small town with 100 people and keep the proportions, it will look like this -
57 Asians 21 Europeans 14 Americans (northern and southern) 8 Africans
52 women 48 men
70 coloured-skins 30 caucasians
6 people would own 59% of the whole world wealth and all of them will be from the United States of America
80 would have bad living conditions
70 will be uneducated
50 will be underfed
1 would die
2 would be born
1 will have a computer
1 (only one) will have higher education

Isn't this shocking !!!

living on hope ...

Donkey A: My owner beats me a Lot.

Donkey B: Why don't you run away ?

Donkey A: I wanted to.... but my future is really bright here...

Donkey B: How do you say that?

Donkey A: Whenever my owner's beautiful daughter commits a mistake, my owner warns her by saying, "I'll marry you with a donkey if you repeat any mistake!"
That's why I'm still here........

Moral: Keeping hopes may not improve your future, but it will certainly reduce the pain of today !!!

bande mei tha dum ... vande maataram

It's not difficult to market Gandhi and his philosophies; it's been done to death by people who have used 'khadi', 'charkha' meaninglessly and his discourses and speeches have been snipped to make quotable quotes. But then, it's not easy to market him either for precisely the same reasons.

Every time there is an act of non-violence people turn around to question "is Gandhi relevant in today's time?" I have never doubted his relevance ever. He will be relevant till the end of times; its just the way we market him to reach a wider audience and spread the Gandhian message.

In 'Lage Raho Munnabhai', the script-writer re-invented Gandhi. Whom the whole world addresses as 'bapu', he had the audacity to call him 'banda' meaning dude...
That was just the first thing. The psyche behind calling him 'banda' was that he could make him relevant to today's youth and the college going students would identify with him. The moment you call someone 'banda' half your burden of respect and honor gets dumped; and you get that feeling of being among your owns.

Now comes the bigger problem of trying to miniaturize his greatness so that people are not intimidated by it. They should not feel that they cannot emulate him. So, what he does next is disguise his greatness, his courage, his fortitude, his inner-calm, his sacrifice into a single word "dum" meaning power/potential...

So, now we have a Gandhi who is a dude with some potential; just like the guy next door. He becomes more approachable and people would not feel dwarfed by his greatness. And the final punch is the reiteration of nationalism in the form of 'Vande Maataram'.

Our national song just got edited or we can say re-invented, so that the youth of today can sing/hum and make more sense of it. Lets give it a shot : bande mei tha dum ... vande maataram; bande mei tha dum ... vande maataram

when i was travelled ...

I came across a very funny post on our firm's Bulletin Board. It was a narration of a bad experience, and I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed not because I am apathetic but because the diction was unbelievably bad and it had loads of grammatical mistakes. And let me tell you that it was not a typo, it was more a case of literally translating sentences from ones mother-tongue to English. I am copy-pasting a snippet of that post:

I had also bad experience in KPN before two weeks. When i was travelled from BLR to my hometown ; near Salem, at 12:00 pm the bus tyre was not in good condition and the bus was dashed with the lorry which was standing on the side of National highway. The passenger sat infront had suffered a lot(including me). At that time one more KPN bus was on the way but they did not stop and some government buses was also not stop . how helpless fellow?????? then after some time, some kpn bus(various places) came on the way and we went to salem ,and then they arranged spare bus for moving from salem to hometown.

So if anyone please tell me a good bus service from Bangalore to Madurai

scary words from wives/gf's

1. (Whatever)

Men: What to have for dinner?
Women: Whatever..
Men: Why not we have steamboat?
Women: Don't want, eat steamboat later get pimples in my face
Men: Alright, why not we have Si Chuan cuisine
Women: Yesterday ate Si Chuan, today eat again?
Men: Hmm..... I suggest we have seafood
Women: Seafood no good, later I got diarrhea
Men: Then what you suggest?
Women : Whatever..

2. (Anything)

Men: So what should we do now?
Women: Anything
Men: How about watching movie? Long time we didn't watch movie
Women: Watching movie no good, waste time only
Men: How about we play bowling, do some exercises?
Women: Exercise in such hot day? You not feel tire meh?
Men: Then find a cafe and have drink
Women: Drink coffee will affect my sleep
Men: Then what you suggest?
Women: Anything

3. (You decide)
Men: Then we just go home
Women: You decide
Men: Let take bus, I will accompany you
Women: Bus is dirty and crowded. Don't want
Men: Ok we will take Taxi
Women: Not worth it... for such a short distance
Men: Alright, then we walk. Take a slow walk
Women: What to walk with empty stomach woh?
Men: Then what you suggest?
Women: You decide
Men: Let's have dinner first
Women: Whatever...
Men: Eat what?
Women: Anything

4. (This One)
Men: Hey, I like this shirt.
Women: No that's too tight...Try this one.
Men: Ok..(proceeds to trial room wears and comes out)
Women: Hey, while you were inside, I found this one...you don't have this shade.
Men: Ok...now you want me to try this one..
Women: Hold on...(and to the salesman)..show that one...
Men: hmmmm
Women: Leave that one....Try this one.....

life is a cup of sugarless coffee...or so we think...

Life is like having a cup of coffee. You sit by the window, lift the cup, take a sip and find no sugar. Too lazy to go for the sugar, you somehow manage with that sugarless cup of coffee. On finishing you discover the un-dissolved sugar crystals settled at the bottom. That is how the life is.

We are so busy running behind those things that WE DON'T HAVE, we fail to put an effort to value what WE HAVE.

So look around, may be the sweetness you are looking for is already with you, but it just needs a STIRRING. May be...

don't become irreplaceable ...

I was chatting with a colleague yesterday, and he mentioned that he was stuck in a rut. He has been doing the same damn thing for more than 4 yrs now. His client has not changed since he joined, and his current project has been going on for more than 2 yrs. He has been in the project since inception, and now he has become whole 'n' soul of the project. Developers have come and gone, and he has just watched it happen while being on the same seat. He is not stagnating as such because new responsibilities have been given to him, but he is just bugged of being there all the time.

 

That's when I told him: dude, you have become irreplaceable and that's the problem.

 

When someone becomes irreplaceable, the dependency on them increases and it soon seems like nothing can be done without them. The only positive I see is that, it's a project related matter; sooner or later they will find someone and start-off with KT's and a smooth transition of responsibilities from one shoulder to another shoulder will happen too.

 

But what if it's a real-life crisis? What if someone becomes irreplaceable in someone else's life?? How do we handle such situations??? We cannot just shift the burden from one shoulder to another, we cannot have a KT for a relationship because it's not a logical issue, it's a psychological issue; nothing to do with the brain and everything to do with the heart.

 

There are no easy answers, but I am not looking for it anyways. All I can say is, please don't get overly-dependant on anybody; and please oh! please ... don't become irreplaceable.

i feared until ...

Another of those mails that I got as a forward. The problem with such forwards is that, they end up becoming chain-mails and its value is lost because people are only interested in sending them to everyone they know, but not reading it themselves and sending it to a select few. Also, such mails have huge images which makes it bulky and so the tendency to delete them is higher. Anyways, I don't know the writer of this piece but I have removed the formatting, made some changes in the verses to make it sound better. Here it goes:

I feared being alone
Until I learned to like myself.
I feared failure
Until I realized that I only fail when I don't try.
I feared success
Until I realized that I had to try in order to be happy with myself.

I feared people's opinions
Until I learned that people would have opinions about me anyway.
I feared rejection
Until I learned to have faith in myself.
I feared pain
Until I learned that it's necessary for growth.

I feared the truth
Until I saw the ugliness in lies.
I feared life
Until I experienced its beauty .
I feared death
Until I realized that it's not an end, but a beginning.

I feared my destiny,
Until I realized that I had the power to change my life.
I feared hate
Until I saw that it was nothing more than ignorance.
I feared love
Until it touched my heart, making the darkness fade into endless sunny days.

I feared ridicule
Until I learned how to laugh at myself.
I feared growing old
Until I realized that I gained wisdom every day.
I feared the future
Until I realized that Life just kept getting better.
I feared the past
Until I realized that it could no longer hurt me.

I feared darkness
Until I saw the beauty of the starlight.
I feared the light
Until I learned that the Truth would give me Strength.
I feared change
Until I saw that a moth becomes a butterfly only after metamorphosis.

always have a dream ...

I got this as a forward, so I thought I would share it here:

Forget about the days
when its been cloudy, but
don't forget your hours in the sun

Forget about the times
you've been defeated, but
don't forget the victories you've won

Forget about mistakes
that you can't change now, but
don't forget the lessons
that you've learnt

Forget about misfortunes
you encounter, but
don't forget the times
your luck has turned

Forget about the days
when you've been lonely, but
don't forget the friendly smiles you've seen

Forget about the plans
that didn't seem to work out right,
but don't forget to always have a dream!

quarter-life crisis

I had heard of mid-life crisis, but never quarter-life crisis. If this was a film parlance and we had Keshto Mukherjee on screen or maybe Amitabh Bachchan of Sharabi fame, then quarter-life crisis would mean: not being able to find a pauua ... quarter :)

Jokes aside, I just got this as a mail. Found it interesting because people never bother to find out what's irking the quarter-aged populace. Here's a small write-up that throws some light on this:

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and
start realizing that there are many things about
yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You
start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in
a year or two, but then get scared because you barely
know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that,
maybe, those friends that you thought you were so
close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have
ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are
some of the most important ones. What you don't
recognize is that they are realizing that too, and
aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that
they are as confused as you.

You look at what ur studying or ur job... and it is
not even close to what you thought you would be doing,
or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that
you are going to have to start at the bottom and that
scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what
others are doing and find yourself judging more than
usual because suddenly you realize that you have
certain boundaries in your life and are constantly
adding things to your list of what is acceptable and
what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the
next, secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your
life. You feel alone and scared and confused.
Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on
to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the
past is drifting further and further away, and there
is nothing to do but stay where you are or move
forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you
loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed
and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough
that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love
someone! but love someone else too and cannot figure
out why you're doing this because you know that you
aren't a bad person. Getting wasted and acting like an
idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same
emotions and questions over and over, and talk with
your friends about the same topics because you cannot
seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money,
the future and making a life for yourself... and while
winning the race would be great, right now you are
scared just to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that every one reading
this relates to it. We are in our best of times and
our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure
this whole thing out. Send this to your
twenty-something friends... maybe it will help someone
feel like they aren't alone in their state of
confusion...

Its called "Quarter-life Crisis." nothing is
constant......except change.
What is life without a few risks? Keep playing the
game

dj's rantings in IT field

I got this as an email and found it to be really very funny and yet truthful. It's like rantings of an IT professional but the presentation is from DJ's point of view; it has reference to character DJ of Rang De Basanti movie. In the movie, DJ explains to Sue about life's trials and tribulations and how hopes of millions are crushed everyday in this ever competitive world. He talks about the insecurities and his own limitations. He is a master of the world that he has created around himself, but he is scared to face the real world once he steps out of his comfort zone.

Read and enjoy the material below; and I am sure you will identify with a few of the things because it's a hard fact that, in IT industry and during this recession, quite a lot of people are on bench and some of them have been on bench for quite sometime, including myself.

Here goes the conversation:-

DJ : wohi duniya de jhamele ..... seat aur PC dhoondo.....project paao..... te PM ki ishaaron pe nachte jaao....
tim lak lak te tim lak lak
u know gulabbo...... mennu iss company mei join huye 2 saal ho gaye..... fir bhi i am here only.
Offshore Develpment Centre ke darwajje ke is taraf... hum PM ko nachaate hai.....
to darwajje ki dooji taraf.....PM hum ko nachataa hai...
tim lak lak te tim lak lak

Sue : mai kuchh samjhi nahi

DJ : mennu bas itthe.....bench pe hi rehna hai.....
idhar......bench vaale log mennu jante hain .......bench pe DJ di koi aukaat hai...
baaki developers kehte hain .....DJ mein badi baat hai....project karega DJ
par andar....project mei achhe achhe DJ pis gaye....java code copy-paste karte karte...........

what is this life, if full of care

I have not found time to write anything 'coz I have been really busy for the past month or so. I have got embroiled in a project that's not going anywhere. Its become like a noose around my neck which is neither letting me sleep, nor rest; nor work in peace.

I have not had anytime for myself, not seen a movie for six months now etc. There's lot to crib about, but that's not what this blog is supposed to carry. Anyways, I started writing quite a few posts but was unable to complete them on time; and soon those posts lost the relevance. Anyways, the only thing on my mind right now is this poem by W.H.Davies. This aptly reflects my situation. Its a beautiful poem which was a part of our syllabus during school days and the entire poem has stayed on, in my mind. Whenever I feel suffocated and feel at loss of time, not able to spend time on myself, meet friends etc; I think of this poem. Here it is, for you:

What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare?

No time to stand beneath the boughs,
And stare as long as sheep and cows:

No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass:

No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night:

No time to turn at Beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance:

No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began?

A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

a book launch, a movie release and a few updates

Yesterday , while I was surfing through the channels [because the IPL match between Bangalore and Punjab was so damned boring] I came across two news items which caught my attention immediately.

In one of the news channel I caught Chetan Bhagat being interviewed, where he spoke about his latest book 'the 3 mistakes of my life'. I am not a fan of his writing style, nor of his story-telling; but what I like is the fact that he is an IIT-IIM product who works as an investment banker in Singapore and still churns out books which are worth a read. His writing style gives me an insight into what kind of reading habits are acceptable to the semi-literate Indians. He does not use big words, technical jargons [unless required]; he sticks to what the common man can make sense of. If some budding writer out there wants to make an impression on the youth of the country then they should adopt his style of writing, or Shobha De's style of writing; and not Vikram Seth and Salman Rushdie.

By the way, Chetan also mentioned that all his books would start with some numeric value, like 'five point someone' and 'one night at a call center'; and now 'the 3 mistakes of my life'. His latest book is priced at Rs.95/- and will be launched soon; to be available in all stores from 8th May,2008.

On another news channel I caught Manoj Night Shyamalan talking about his latest movie 'The Happening'. Presently he is in India to receive the 'Padma Shri' award for his contribution to world cinema. He is the only movie director of Indian origin to have received an Academy Award [Oscar] nomination for Best Director.

“It is an extremely scary movie. This is meant to scare you,” Shayamalan told the curious reporters in Mumbai. “The emotional center of the movie is if you knew you were going to die, if that was a fact, what would your conversation be like? What would be the last thing you would say to your loved one?” Shyamalan said. The movie is to be released on 13th June,2008.

I have loved all his movies, including the ones that did not do so well; like 'The Village' and 'Lady In The Water'. His ideas are amazing and innovative; and his visual imagery in film-making is just wonderful. Though he has not been able to match-up to the brilliance of his debut movie 'The Sixth Sense', I am sure that he will come back to his own.

Since I mentioned Shobha De and her writing style, here's an update on her. Her new book titled 'Superstar India' was unveiled by Amitabh Bachchan on her 60th birthday. The book is a collection of her views and opinions on lots of topics. The book reflects her understanding of middle class ethos, competitiveness, killer instinct and the vanishing traditional values in the face of globalization. According to her book, India has always been a superstar but unaware of its potential and the special status. She goes on to suggest that the comman man's tolerance of bad governance, indifferent administration and corrupt officials are responsible for holding us back. The book also touches upon controversial topics like sex education, gay movement in India and sexual liberation among today's youth. Do get your hands on the book and read the interesting bits.

In another update, the WWE wrestler Khali is back in India after a three year stint in US as a part of the WWE team. He was mobbed at the airport by reporters and journalists. If those reporters are to be believed, then he will soon be making an entry into IPL matches and try to woo the crowd. He has also been approached by movie makers who have signed him on for a couple of movie offers.

That's all the update I have. I am pretty sure that I will be reading both the books I have written about, as well as watching the movie. Make sure you do so too.

Sachin Tendulkar ... Who Said What About Him

Last week Sachin celebrated his 36th birthday on 24th of March. I wanted to write a tribute to him but did not find much time. I will probably do that when he hangs-up his gloves and bat. For now, all I can say is that its a real shame that we are not getting to see him bat in the current IPL T20 season else Mumbai Indians would have been in much better position in the points tally. I just pray for his speedy recovery and hope he gets back to the field as soon as possible, and entertain the crowds as he has been doing for past 19 years.

For the time being, as a tribute, I have a listed a collection of quotes on Sachin. Read them and enjoy !!!

• K R Wadhwaney: "Batting has been God's gift to him. Candidly, Sir Donald Bradman, a boy from Bowrel, had not been as gifted as India's little young man."

________________________________________

• Mohinder Amarnath: "A complete batsman- he's the best in the business."

________________________________________

• Lalchand Rajput, Former Mumbai captain: "Even as a teenager he always seemed very focused and alert on the field. He learnt his lessons fast."

________________________________________

• Prof. R. Shetty, Secretary MCA: "We are proud to possess him due to his commitment to Mumbai and Indian cricket."

________________________________________

• Harsha Bhogle: "There's no better sight on the cricket field than watch Tendulkar bat."

________________________________________

• Raj Singh, Former President Indian Cricket Board: "I was very impressed the first time I saw him bat as a little boy at the Cricket Club of India."

________________________________________

• Don Bradman: I saw him playing on television and was struck by his technique, so I asked my wife to come look at him. Now I never saw myself play, but I feel that this player is playing much the same as I used to play, and she looked at him on Television and said yes, there is a similarity between the two...hi compactness, technique, stroke production... it all seemed to gel!

________________________________________

• David Boon: "Technically he stands out as the best because of his ability to increase the pace at will".

________________________________________

• Jeff Thompson: "Sachin is an attacker. He has much more power than Sunny. He wants to be the one to set the pace. He has to be on top. That's the buzz about him."

________________________________________

• Shane Warne: You have to decide for yourself whether you're bowling well or not. He's going to hit you for fours and sixes anyway. Kasprowicz has a superior story. During the Bangalore Test, frustrated, he went to Dennis Lillee and asked, "Mate, do you see any weaknesses?" Lillee replied, "No Michael, as long as you walk off with your pride that's all you can do."

________________________________________

• Mark Taylor: "He's a phenomenon. We have to be switched on when he plays allow him no boundries, for then he doesn't stop."

________________________________________

• Ian Healy: "Tendulkar is the most complete batsman I have stood behind. I saw the hundred in Perth on a bouncy pitch with Hughes, McDermott and Whitney gunning for him - he only had 60-odd when No 11 came in. I've seen him against Warne too."

________________________________________

• Ian Chappell: "Harder he works, the luckier he gets."

________________________________________

• Richie Benaud: "He has defined cricket in his fabulous, impeccable manner. He is to batting what Shane Warne is to bowling."

________________________________________

• Mike Coward: "Sachin's the best. I've had this view since I saw him score that hundred in Sydney in 1992. He's the most composed batsman I've ever seen."

________________________________________

• Paul Wilson: "He's better than Ben Hur.

________________________________________

• Mark Waugh: "The pressure on me is nothing as compared to Sachin Tendulkar. Sachin, like God, must never fail. The crowd always expects him to succeed and it is too much pressure on him."

________________________________________

• Glenn McGrath: "I still think Tendulkar is the best batsmen in the world ahead of Steve Waugh and Lara"

________________________________________

• Sir. Gary Sobers: "He is currently the best batsman in the world."

________________________________________

• Brian Lara: "He's a genius. I'm a mere mortal."

________________________________________

• Micheal Holding: "Sachin's undoubtedly no.1 today but I wouldn't start comparing him with Viv Richards till he scores hundreds against quality fast bowlers on fast pitches."

________________________________________

• Vivian Richards: "He's 99.5 percent perfect. I'd pay to see him."

________________________________________

• Wesley Halls: "The only way to stop him is to keep him off the strike."

________________________________________

• Vivian Richards: "He's always ready, it's a mental preparedness thing. I too focused on being aggressive. But Sachin has something special. He's blessed."

________________________________________

• Clive Lloyd: "He is a tremendous cricketer. He is young and has got a lot of ability. He's got his own style. He has got the temperament for big cricket and I hope that he goes from strength to strength."

________________________________________

• Brian Lara: "He is a very good batsman. Perhaps he is the best in the world now. If he plays consistently he will go down in history as a great cricketer."

________________________________________

• Tony Greig: "He is cool, has magnificent temperament, and is so mature you tend to forget his age. I can't think of any other example of a player who has so dominated the world before the age of 25."

________________________________________

• Ted Dexter: (who chaired the panel, the Coopers & Lybrand award as the International Test player of the year) "This year Tendulkar has been the batsman nobody wanted to bowl at. He took Shane Warne apart in India, which illustrates his genius."

________________________________________

• The Rev David Shepherd: "Sachin Tendulkar! If he isn't the best player in the world, I want to see the best player in the world."

________________________________________

• Tony Lewis: "He has a most competitive temperament. He has not needed special coaches to teach him how to compete. It is inbuilt."

________________________________________

• Adam Hollioke: "In an over I can bowl six different balls. But then Sachin looks at me with a sort of gentle arrogance down the pitch as if to say 'Can you bowl me another one?'"

________________________________________

• Tony Grieg: "There's no doubt about it. He is the best."

________________________________________

• Geoffrey Boycott: "Technically, you can't fault Sachin. Seam or spin, fast or slow - nothing is a problem."

________________________________________

• Peter Roebuck: "Sometime back I had written a piece that said that Sachin's the master and Lara a genius with his head high up somewhere. That's it."

________________________________________

• Kieth Fletcher: "A little genius. Reminds me of Sunny Gavaskar."

________________________________________

• Eddie Barlow: "He is Sachin Tendulkar. I hope he stays Sachin Tendulkar. We need a new player, a player in his own way. He has a technique which is the hallmark of a great player. Everything indicates that he will be a great player and I am sure he will prove me right. Reminds me of Barry Richards."

________________________________________

• Barry Richards: "Destined to be a great."

________________________________________

• Paul Strang: "What we (Zimbabwe) need is 10 Tendulkars."

________________________________________

• Dave Houghton: "Other players might keep India in business in the '99 World Cup but victory shall only come through his bat."

________________________________________

• Wasim Akram: "He has everything a top batsman needs. Tendulkar is a classic example of a player being so good that his age is an irrelevance"

________________________________________

• Asif Iqbal: (after India won at Sharjah) "He has given a new dimension to batting. Such dominance can break the heart of the best of bowlers. I was never tired of watching this wonderful batsman."

________________________________________

• INDIA TODAY describing Sachin's 155* at Chennai, 1998 vs Australia: "There is no way to tell it. The art of fiction is dead. Reality has strangled invention. Only the utterly impossible, the inexpressibly fantastic can ever be plausible again."

________________________________________

• Garth Jones (Scorer for the press in Napier, NZ): "We know a big innings from the prodigy means a definite loss for New Zealand, but it is worth it."

Let me end the post with these words: Cricket is religion, Sachin is GOD.

Prostitution Of Cricket

Let me declare at the very outset that I am a huge cricket buff. I have been watching cricket for 20 years now; every knock of Tendulkar gives me a reason to smile, every catch of Yuvi/Kaif raised my hope of winning, every inning of Dravid made me feel solid.....I can go on, but thats not the point here.

What I am trying to get to is that, inspite of my love for the game, the recent auction of players for the IPL [Indian Premier League] has left me dazed and confused. The astronomical amounts that the franchisees have gutted out is incredible. And in all this trade and commerce, the game has been sidelined. In a bid to cash-on in the name of the game, we have lost the essential meaning of cricket. Its turned into a milch cow for the entertainment industry.

India no doubt has only two passions - bollywood and cricket. And when these two big forms of entertainment join hands then a whole lot of revenue can be generated. You may then ask me what's the harm ?? Well, it's gonna hurt the game. We will have a whole lot of cricket but no real sports.

Anyways, what I detest most is the fact that the players were auctioned. That's so demeaning for the players, what is this .... a whorehouse?? Why couldn't they do this in privy and just make an announcement that 'x' player was signed up for a contract of 'yz,000,000' amount. Wouldn't this show the players and the promoters in good light?? But no, they wanted a 'tamasha' to display money power and do some body-shopping.

Now, the consequence would be that....the players will feel like they have been a part of major flesh trade racquet and they will have to perform out of their skins to justify the amount for which they were 'purchased'. If this isn't akin to prostitution then what is it ?? What's worse is that, they will be forced to give their best here and this will result in a below-par performance when they will be representing the country in international test matches and ODI's. We have already seen that in premier leagues involving other sports like baseball and football, players refuse to play for their home country and/or fake injuries so that they can keep themselves fit for the club they have signed-up to play for. They put their mouth where the money is.

Enough spoken about the game, now let's take a look at bollywood which indulged a great deal in the auctions. SRK had to dance half-naked to 'dard-e-disco' and he did a whole lot of gymanstics to sell his movie OSO whose production value was 60 crores. Now that he is putting 400 crores just imagine how much of heavy advertising and promotions he will have to do. He may have to sell himself or dance naked in the stadium to attract the spectators and boost the sales of tickets. And he is not the only one who will be doing so. He will bring a bevy of stars along with him. Then, there's Vijay Mallya who will bring in the glamour quotient with all those kingfisher calendar girls. Mukesh Ambani will also rope-in some bollywood stars and politicians because even he needs to generate profits.

The recently concluded ICL [Indian Cricket League] series was a small trailer of what's in store ahead. We saw a little bit of cricket a lots of item songs being performed by bollywood starlets at the beginning of the match and during the lunch session. ICL had lined up all the popular 'item' girls to perform and we could easy guage that the audience were more enthralled by the stars' performance than the cricketers. And this trend is going to continue.

So, be prepared to see some 'nautanki', some staged dramas, popular dance numbers, lots of lucky-dip winners, sales, promotions, meaningless ad campaigns, skimpily clad cheer-leaders and ramp models, tv stars, of course filmstars and bollywood personalities. And if you are fortunate enough, you will catch a little bit of cricket too.

george costanza - a character from 'seinfeld'

Let me start off by explaining to you the meaning of sitcom, a word that's grossly mis-used by many promos who claim their series to be a sitcom, but they are not actually sitcoms. Sitcom stands for SITuational COMedy, a comedy that's created by a situation and done tastefully without any caricaturing and lampooning. By far, the best sitcom I have ever seen is 'Seinfeld' created by Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld himself.

The series revolves around 4 characters, Jerry-George-Kramer-Elaine, who who have no regards for societal norms and a scant view of the society in general; they live in a world of their own. All the four have their own whims and fancies and an obscured outlook on life. And the most fascinating of all the four characters is George Costanza who forever changed shallowness and selfishness one could exhibit in public. He made it sound cool, look funny and justified his asinine behavior by stoooping to new lows. He lowered the bar of morality, glorified misdemeanor and cheap behavior, he had no work ethics, he had no job for most part of the series and lived off his parents, he had no money, no steady girlfriend, no prospects in life, and no conceivable reason to wake up in the mornings, except perhaps to get the daily news perhaps.


Anyways, here are some of the most memorable lines that he delivered in the series. It exemplifies everything that I have tried to convey above:

• Every decision I have ever made in my entire life, has been wrong. My life is the complete opposite of everything I wanted to be. Every instinct I have, in every aspect of life, is it something to wear, something to eat, it’s all been wrong
• Yeah, I’m a great quitter: it’s one of the few things I do well… I come from a long line of quitters. My father was a quitter, my grandfather was a quitter… I was raised to give up
• It's not a lie, if you believe it
• Pity's very underrated. I like pity. It's good
• If you look annoyed all the time, people think you're busy
• But, but I’m disturbed…I’m depressed…I’m inadequate; I got it all
• I know less about women than anyone in the world
• I always get the feeling that when lesbians are looking at me they’re thinking, that’s why I’m not a heterosexual
• I think I can sum up the show for you with one word; Nothing
• When women smile at me I don't know what it means. Sometimes I interpret it like they're psychotic or something. And I don't know if I'm supposed to smile back. I don't know what to do.
• For me to ask a woman out, I've got to get into a mental state like the karate guys before they break the bricks
• Instead of doing a wash, I just keep buying underwear. My goal is to have over 360 pair. That way I only have to do wash once a year
• She thinks I'm a nice guy. Women always think I'm nice. But women don't want nice. Why is nice bad? What kind of a sick society are we living in when nice is bad?
• Why did it all turn out like this for me? I had so much promise. I was personable. I was bright. Oh, maybe not academically speaking, but I was perceptive. I always know when someone's uncomfortable at a party. It all became very clear to me sitting out there today, that every decision I've ever made in my entire life has been wrong. My life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be. Every instinct I have in every aspect of life, be it something to wear, something to eat... It's often wrong
• Hey, believe me, baldness will catch on. When the aliens come, who do you think they're gonna relate to? Who do you think's gonna be the first ones getting a tour of the ship?
• I'm much more comfortable criticizing people behind their backs
• You know, the funny thing is, somehow I find her more appealing now... It's like if I knew she was a lesbian when we went out, I never would've broken up with her
• Borrowing money from a friend is like having sex. It just completely changes the relationship
• No, I can't. I can't die with dignity. I have no dignity. I want to be the one person who doesn't die with dignity. I live my whole life in shame. Why should I die with dignity?
• I just threw away a lifetime of guilt-free sex, and floor seats for every sporting event in Madison Square Garden. So please, a little respect. For I am Costanza: Lord of the Idiots!
• I wish there were pigmen. You get a few of these pigmen walking around I'm looking a whole lot better. Then if somebody wants to fix me up at least they could say, "Hey he's no pig-man!"
• Bald men with no jobs and no money who live with their parents don't approach strange women
• You know I always wanted to pretend I was an architect
• I don't think I could do it. You know, they always remember the first time. I don't want to be remembered. I wanna be forgotten
• I don't want hope. Hope is killing me. My dream is to become hopeless. When you're hopeless you don't care. And when you don't care, that indifference makes you attractive.
• The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A death. What’s that, a bonus?!?! I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you go live in an old age home. You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, then, when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work forty years until you’re young enough to enjoy your retirement. You drink alcohol, you party, and you get ready for high school. You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities. You become a little baby, you go back, spend your last 9 months floating with luxuries like central heating, spa, room service on tap, then you finish off as an orgasm! Amen

be thankful ...

I don't really want to believe in these kind of mails but then I realize that things don't come easy in life. I feel that sometimes despite of our best efforts things don't turn out the way we want them to. So, instead of becoming morose and complain about it, some people try to console themselves by taking things positively and penning down such stuff. Here it is:

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire.
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?
Be thankful when you don't know something,
for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.
Be thankful for your limitations,
because they give you opportunities for improvement.
Be thankful for each new challenge,
because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes.
They will teach you valuable lessons.
Be thankful when you're tired and weary,
because it means you've made a difference.

It's easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who
are also thankful for the setbacks.
Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles,
and they can become your blessings.

I don't know who wrote this, if you do then let me know too.